June 5, 2004

  • Make sure to read all the way to the end!!!
           Too funny!
              A mother enters her daughter's bedroom and sees a an
    Envelope with "Mom" written on it lying on the bed.  In great 
    trepidation, she tears open the envelope and reads the enclosed letter, 
    her heart in her shoes.
               Dearest Mom:
              I am so happy; I have eloped with my new boyfriend.  I have found 
    real passion and he is so nice, with his piercing and Special tattoos,
    especially the one with my name in a heart.  I just 
    Love his big motorcycle, but it's not only that, Mom, I'm sort of
     Pregnant and Yaqui (that's Swahili for "Warrior Prince") said that we 
    will be very happy in his trailer in the woods.  
    He wants to have many more children with me 
    and that's one of my dreams.
             
              I've learned that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone, so we'll 
    be growing it for ourselves and Yaqui's friends, who will swap  for all the 
    cocaine and ecstasy drugs we want.
               In the meantime, we'll pray for the science to find the
    AIDS cure, for Yaqui to get better. Don't worry about me, Mom, I'm 15 years 
    old now and I know how to take care of myself.  Some day I'll visit for you to 
    know your grandchildren.
               Your daughter, Melissa Louise
     
              P.S.: Hey, Mom, don't freak, none of this is true.  
    I'm at Judy's house.  I just wanted to show you there are lots 
    worse things in life than the report card in my desk drawer  . . .  
    Love you,
     Missy
          
              P.P.S.:  Call me when it's safe to come home.
           

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